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While spending time in Admiral's naval fleet several experiences happened because I didn't know what to expect. Here are 10 basics I learned with trial by fire early on. Here goes, girlfriend to girlfriend.
1. Know that you will be 'taking the wheel' (that means steer) sooner than later.
2. Something will break that the Captain will attempt to repair right away. His head will disappear into a hole leaving his butt sticking up in the air - hence you have to 'take the wheel'.
3. Your manicure is shot.
4. You will have at least 2 new bruises when you disembark (get off the boat).
5. Slop on loads of sunscreen as you will sweat it off. Then slop on more.
6. Take a bag for sea shells to go in and a large beach towel. If the boat is sans potty, be sure there's a bucket to fill in. You will use all.
7. For entertainment (besides the Captain's butt sticking out while repairing the boat) bring bread, crackers and like bits to feed the gulls. How they hover is delightful and amazing.
8. You'll enjoy wearing your sunglasses and a brimmed hat. Hold on to your hat. Forget about your hair.
9. Wear comfortable clothes and layer up. You know what to do if it's cold or hot.
10. The Captain has rules. You'll have more fun if you know what they are so ask before boarding (getting on the boat). You might prefer to stay on shore if they are stupid (no food allowed and no sunbathing) or too many.
My hope is that you're saved a boat load (no pun intended) of upset and have a head start on a good time on the water. Bon voyage, girlfriend.
What signs do you miss?
White linen covered the table. Three small cakes, forks and napkins were perfectly placed on top. Chef was very official in his white jacket with thermometer in its custom pocket. Admiral, the king of sweets, was delighted to be tasting samples for our wedding cake.
"This is my wedding pound cake, traditional with a delicious icing." Chef said, putting a small slice on plates in front of us. As I tasted the cake, memories of all wedding cake filled my mind.
"What's the next one? I don't like this one. It's sorta dull and bland." Admiral said as he moved the plate aside. Left over cake was the sure sign it wasn't the winner.
"This is my carrot cake. It has extra pecans in it. The icing is cream cheese. Not the traditional cream cheese, it's my special creation. Smokie told me carrot cake was your favorite." Chef said as he slid plated slices of beautiful orangey moist cake before us. Curiously, I tasted it, searching again for flavors Chef described. Admiral ate the first fork full, mumbled about how yummy it was, and woofed down several more bites.
As he put plates with another different slice before us, Chef said "This is the lemon cake brides today like. It's another specialty of mine. The icing is soft and light to compliment the moist cake."
While we ate, Chef and I talked about servings, themes, and costs. Being cost conscious, I said "What can you tell me about cupcakes? I've seen them at weddings."
Admiral replaced the unfinished lemon cake with the remaining carrot cake. Quickly it disappeared as Chef and I talked about more about cupcakes.
"Are you going to eat that?" Admiral asked, pointing at my left-over carrot cake.
"It's all yours." I said, passing the plate to him.
"Chef, from the way Admiral is loving the carrot cake, it's the winner. How does it do in cupcakes?" I asked.
Not realizing that Admiral was paying attention to the discussion, he chimed in "It's a wedding and there should be wedding cake, not cupcakes." Don't you love a man who says his mind!
With another wedding decision made it was time for more research and development to see how well we live together. Honeymoon #3 was beginning. Naples, Florida was the destination where weather was certainly better than RVA.
Play was the agenda. The excursion to Key West by water was on a whale watching boat from Cape Cod. Who knew a tour boat and its crew were snow birds too?
From the boat's arrival in Key West harbor, to chocolate covered frozen Key Lime pie on a stick, to a pedicab ride down Duval St., and Margaritaville, its energy is contagious. The atmosphere is electric, no holds barred on the possible. Scooters, 'steered' by high schoolers on spring break, sped everywhere, adding their constantly blowing horns to the din of Key West.
The return trip to Marco Island was rough, even for a seasoned boater. Both hands holding tightly to stationary objects were barely enough to stay upright for an urgent trip to the loo. Admiral entertained himself doing origami, learned from a first-grade playmate. My attention was on March Madness, interrupted with films of the day's global disaster. Knowing Japan had been destroyed by the tsunami that morning made the whole day's experience seem surreal.
Calmer waters returned and play time was ample in the 'little boat', an 18 foot jet boat. It bobs like a cork in waves and loves to go in circles - at its will.
"OK, you drive today." Admiral said matter-of-factly. With my heart beating in sheer terror, I gasped "Are you sure? I've never driven a boat like this. I ride in it much better." I gasped, trying to be non chalant and hoping he'd get the hint.
"Oh, you can do this. It's easy. Go ahead. Sit here and take the wheel." he replied, pointing to the driver's chair.
Off we went with friend Ray along. The noisy engine drowned my pounding heart and short breathes. We were headed up the Intercoastal Waterway to Naples for lunch, about a nine mile ride. Under my control the little boat went into circles. Efforts on my part to stop it only made more circles.
"What am I doing or not doing!" I hollered to Admiral, who was watching gauges and dials. Ray watched the water to be sure I didn't run aground.
"Oh, it'll straighten out. Don't turn the wheel so fast. You're doing fine. Kick it up a little bit. We have a ways to go yet." he assured me.
As I sped up, we passed boats. "What's up with these boaters putting along? The water's calm and flat. Am I hearing sirens out here? I did see a Coast Guard auxiliary boat." I wondered.
"Slow to idle speed now." the loudspeaker said.
"What in the world is that!" I yelled over our loud engine.
"Smokie, you'd better slow down to idle now. It's the Coast Guard. Did you bring your Drivers License?" Admiral said as officers in life jackets pulled alongside and tied us onto their huge boat.
"Yes sir, I own this boat, Officers. Smokie, look in the box for the registration. We're headed to Naples on this fine sunny afternoon." Admiral said cheerfully, in response to their inquiry about the boat's ownership. "She's driving under my supervision." he added. Thank heavens he said that since I was sans driver's license.
We chatted with the officers while they did the Coast Guard safety inspection of our equipment. Inow they weren't old enough to be in that big boat by themselves. "Didn't you see the slow down signs? You're in a manatee zone, you know."
"Officers, we were chatting and missed them. It won't happen again." Admiral vowed. "How far is it to Naples from here?" he asked as they untied and released our little boat.
With Admiral at the wheel we heard them say "You have about an hour to go yet. Drive slow." as we headed on our way.
Collectively we said, "Whew! that was close. Thank heavens all this required safety stuff was flawless. We were lucky to get off with a warning. Naples, here we come. We need a drink. Ray, forget low water and running aground. Watch for those signs!"
"This is my wedding pound cake, traditional with a delicious icing." Chef said, putting a small slice on plates in front of us. As I tasted the cake, memories of all wedding cake filled my mind.
"What's the next one? I don't like this one. It's sorta dull and bland." Admiral said as he moved the plate aside. Left over cake was the sure sign it wasn't the winner.
"This is my carrot cake. It has extra pecans in it. The icing is cream cheese. Not the traditional cream cheese, it's my special creation. Smokie told me carrot cake was your favorite." Chef said as he slid plated slices of beautiful orangey moist cake before us. Curiously, I tasted it, searching again for flavors Chef described. Admiral ate the first fork full, mumbled about how yummy it was, and woofed down several more bites.
As he put plates with another different slice before us, Chef said "This is the lemon cake brides today like. It's another specialty of mine. The icing is soft and light to compliment the moist cake."
While we ate, Chef and I talked about servings, themes, and costs. Being cost conscious, I said "What can you tell me about cupcakes? I've seen them at weddings."
Admiral replaced the unfinished lemon cake with the remaining carrot cake. Quickly it disappeared as Chef and I talked about more about cupcakes.
"Are you going to eat that?" Admiral asked, pointing at my left-over carrot cake.
"It's all yours." I said, passing the plate to him.
"Chef, from the way Admiral is loving the carrot cake, it's the winner. How does it do in cupcakes?" I asked.
Not realizing that Admiral was paying attention to the discussion, he chimed in "It's a wedding and there should be wedding cake, not cupcakes." Don't you love a man who says his mind!
With another wedding decision made it was time for more research and development to see how well we live together. Honeymoon #3 was beginning. Naples, Florida was the destination where weather was certainly better than RVA.
Play was the agenda. The excursion to Key West by water was on a whale watching boat from Cape Cod. Who knew a tour boat and its crew were snow birds too?
From the boat's arrival in Key West harbor, to chocolate covered frozen Key Lime pie on a stick, to a pedicab ride down Duval St., and Margaritaville, its energy is contagious. The atmosphere is electric, no holds barred on the possible. Scooters, 'steered' by high schoolers on spring break, sped everywhere, adding their constantly blowing horns to the din of Key West.
The return trip to Marco Island was rough, even for a seasoned boater. Both hands holding tightly to stationary objects were barely enough to stay upright for an urgent trip to the loo. Admiral entertained himself doing origami, learned from a first-grade playmate. My attention was on March Madness, interrupted with films of the day's global disaster. Knowing Japan had been destroyed by the tsunami that morning made the whole day's experience seem surreal.
Calmer waters returned and play time was ample in the 'little boat', an 18 foot jet boat. It bobs like a cork in waves and loves to go in circles - at its will.
"OK, you drive today." Admiral said matter-of-factly. With my heart beating in sheer terror, I gasped "Are you sure? I've never driven a boat like this. I ride in it much better." I gasped, trying to be non chalant and hoping he'd get the hint.
"Oh, you can do this. It's easy. Go ahead. Sit here and take the wheel." he replied, pointing to the driver's chair.
Off we went with friend Ray along. The noisy engine drowned my pounding heart and short breathes. We were headed up the Intercoastal Waterway to Naples for lunch, about a nine mile ride. Under my control the little boat went into circles. Efforts on my part to stop it only made more circles.
"What am I doing or not doing!" I hollered to Admiral, who was watching gauges and dials. Ray watched the water to be sure I didn't run aground.
"Oh, it'll straighten out. Don't turn the wheel so fast. You're doing fine. Kick it up a little bit. We have a ways to go yet." he assured me.
As I sped up, we passed boats. "What's up with these boaters putting along? The water's calm and flat. Am I hearing sirens out here? I did see a Coast Guard auxiliary boat." I wondered.
"Slow to idle speed now." the loudspeaker said.
"What in the world is that!" I yelled over our loud engine.
"Smokie, you'd better slow down to idle now. It's the Coast Guard. Did you bring your Drivers License?" Admiral said as officers in life jackets pulled alongside and tied us onto their huge boat.
"Yes sir, I own this boat, Officers. Smokie, look in the box for the registration. We're headed to Naples on this fine sunny afternoon." Admiral said cheerfully, in response to their inquiry about the boat's ownership. "She's driving under my supervision." he added. Thank heavens he said that since I was sans driver's license.
We chatted with the officers while they did the Coast Guard safety inspection of our equipment. Inow they weren't old enough to be in that big boat by themselves. "Didn't you see the slow down signs? You're in a manatee zone, you know."
"Officers, we were chatting and missed them. It won't happen again." Admiral vowed. "How far is it to Naples from here?" he asked as they untied and released our little boat.
With Admiral at the wheel we heard them say "You have about an hour to go yet. Drive slow." as we headed on our way.
Collectively we said, "Whew! that was close. Thank heavens all this required safety stuff was flawless. We were lucky to get off with a warning. Naples, here we come. We need a drink. Ray, forget low water and running aground. Watch for those signs!"
How do you get it all done?
"What fun it'll be. Cruising to Nantucket and back on your boat! I'm not going anywhere 'til Miss V, grandchild #2, arrives in late May, maybe. Babies come when they come and her mom was 2 weeks late." I declared to Admiral, who was setting a mid June departure date.
It was early February. Summer was coming, going and then it's wedding day. Just thinking about all the to-dos made me weak. Not enjoying planning, time had come to cast aside any ideas that things would magically happen on their own. Spontaneity wouldn't make this stuff happen. I had to pull up my big girl panties and plan. Simply plan to move, redo my house, find a tenant to rent it, go on four more honeymoons, take care of clients, and handle endless wedding details.
With pen, calendar and paper, I camped out at a Starbuck's not visited before. I knew too many people to be at my regular one.
My caffeine level rose as lists got longer. Smoke came from my pen as details to accomplish filled the 'Get 'Er Done' pages covering the next seven months. "Lordy, this is huge like an elephant. How'm I going to do all this?! I'm overwhelmed. And it will get done without killing me." I declared to no one as I stuffed dozens of papers into my notebook. That notebook, vinyl covered with pretty flowers and stripes in all my fave colors, was the sacred notebook, travelling with me everywhere. Each list was like Santa's - checked twice daily. So much for spontaneity.
My new life with Admiral was the time to let go of stuff that had served me well. Carefully I selected the pieces to move. The rest would stay to provide a lovely home for the next resident at 509H.
Admiral's quite the delegator, as you've guessed. At his instruction I was to make his big, beautiful RVA house our home. Little did I know unloading his Florida house was good practice for unloading this one, as it was chock full of furniture and all stuff that fills up houses.
"Admiral, you said some furniture needs to go." I began, going on to tell my plan to clear out the excess and make room for my five additions and a new look.
"Sounds great. Just leave my garage alone." he said.
With a big roll of blue painter's tape, I went room to room, marking clearly with a tape piece what I thought should go.
An hour later, Admiral and I toured each room. I pointed out each blue taped item. "Hm, that's always been here. Don't know where that came from. I've always liked that. Yea, I'm glad that's going." were some of his remarks, delighting me that he agreed with 99% of my choices.
Then he got quiet. Seriously he said "I don't have any blue tape on me, do I?"
It was early February. Summer was coming, going and then it's wedding day. Just thinking about all the to-dos made me weak. Not enjoying planning, time had come to cast aside any ideas that things would magically happen on their own. Spontaneity wouldn't make this stuff happen. I had to pull up my big girl panties and plan. Simply plan to move, redo my house, find a tenant to rent it, go on four more honeymoons, take care of clients, and handle endless wedding details.
With pen, calendar and paper, I camped out at a Starbuck's not visited before. I knew too many people to be at my regular one.
My caffeine level rose as lists got longer. Smoke came from my pen as details to accomplish filled the 'Get 'Er Done' pages covering the next seven months. "Lordy, this is huge like an elephant. How'm I going to do all this?! I'm overwhelmed. And it will get done without killing me." I declared to no one as I stuffed dozens of papers into my notebook. That notebook, vinyl covered with pretty flowers and stripes in all my fave colors, was the sacred notebook, travelling with me everywhere. Each list was like Santa's - checked twice daily. So much for spontaneity.
My new life with Admiral was the time to let go of stuff that had served me well. Carefully I selected the pieces to move. The rest would stay to provide a lovely home for the next resident at 509H.
Admiral's quite the delegator, as you've guessed. At his instruction I was to make his big, beautiful RVA house our home. Little did I know unloading his Florida house was good practice for unloading this one, as it was chock full of furniture and all stuff that fills up houses.
"Admiral, you said some furniture needs to go." I began, going on to tell my plan to clear out the excess and make room for my five additions and a new look.
"Sounds great. Just leave my garage alone." he said.
With a big roll of blue painter's tape, I went room to room, marking clearly with a tape piece what I thought should go.
An hour later, Admiral and I toured each room. I pointed out each blue taped item. "Hm, that's always been here. Don't know where that came from. I've always liked that. Yea, I'm glad that's going." were some of his remarks, delighting me that he agreed with 99% of my choices.
Then he got quiet. Seriously he said "I don't have any blue tape on me, do I?"
Is this how you do business?
Wedding plans weighed heavily on me. Honeymoon #1 ended adn real life began again when the plane touched down in RVA on the January afternoon cloaked in winter dull. Admiral and I had passed the first of what would be many trials at life together with flying colors.
Flowers were the next item to line up on the wedding to-do check list. There were names of three florists who did over-the-top statement floral work. I looked forward to seeing their shops, the lovely flowers, planning the bouquets and getting to know them. And so it was that on the coldest Monday morning in early February I popped into the premier florist shop.
Christmas decor was coming down, replaced by Valentine's red and pink. In the tiny store boxes and dust were everywhere, giving no room for the exquisite display I was expecting. While a designer put flowers in a vase, a man worked on a card table amongst piles of things that almost buried him.
I asked "Do you do wedding flowers?"
He looked up, put some papers in a stack, looked over his glasses at me and said "Yes, we do. We do the important big name weddings in town."
"I'm at the right place. Bouquets and all wedding flowers are on my mind. You were recommended by several people. I know vaguely what I want and there's plenty of room for your creativity and style to explode. The wedding is September 10. Are there some pictures of work you've done that I can see?" I asked.
Looking annoyed and moving papers on his table, he hollered "Hey, Jim, where's that photo album with the bouquets in it? It's around here somewhere."
Jim said "Maybe it's in the cabinet. I haven't seen it in ages. I have to finish putting these ornaments away now."
"I don't have time to look for it now. Honey, your wedding is so far away. Come back in April or May to talk about this." the man said, his voice dripping with annoyance, his look saying "I am so done with you."
"My calendar's in the car. I'll go get it and we can set an appointment. I'm travelling a lot and want to be sure we talk." I replied.
"Oh, honey, call in May to set it up." he said emphatically. Irritation oozed from his voice and face.
"That's how you do business?" I asked.
"Honey, call back in May." he said as he returned to his cluttered table.
I left the disheveled and dirty store thinking "Now that's customer service. That's a phone call I won't make. "
A week later, I went to florist #2 on my list. The shop was spacious, orderly and oddly quiet. "Hello. Anyone home?" I hollered, admiring the delightful arrangements.
From the back a voice said "I'm coming. I'm putting the last flower in this vase." An attractive man appeared. "Hi there. Thanks for waiting. How can I help you?"he said.
"I have a 1 o'clock appointment with Randy to talk about wedding flowers." I answered.
"Randy isn't here. He's making deliveries and can't be reached." he said.
Surprised I said "I talked to him weeks ago and he set this time and he's not here?!" I thought "It's been a long time since I was stood up. Everyone has cell phones and he's not reachable. That's one heck of a delivery he's on!"
The phone rang a week later. The man said "Hi. It's Randy. I called to reschedule our appointment to talk about your flowers. "
"Randy, honestly I was really surprised you weren't there. We'd set the appointment at your convenience! It's taken seven days to call me" I said.
"I can explain." he said, sharing details causing his absence.
I replied "I don't trust you to handle my wedding flowers. I don't know they'd get to the church on time. No one called to cancel the date. You've shone me your customer service and it's not for me. Thank you for your call today."
I wondered "If top two florists do business like this, what's the third one like?"
Flowers were the next item to line up on the wedding to-do check list. There were names of three florists who did over-the-top statement floral work. I looked forward to seeing their shops, the lovely flowers, planning the bouquets and getting to know them. And so it was that on the coldest Monday morning in early February I popped into the premier florist shop.
Christmas decor was coming down, replaced by Valentine's red and pink. In the tiny store boxes and dust were everywhere, giving no room for the exquisite display I was expecting. While a designer put flowers in a vase, a man worked on a card table amongst piles of things that almost buried him.
I asked "Do you do wedding flowers?"
He looked up, put some papers in a stack, looked over his glasses at me and said "Yes, we do. We do the important big name weddings in town."
"I'm at the right place. Bouquets and all wedding flowers are on my mind. You were recommended by several people. I know vaguely what I want and there's plenty of room for your creativity and style to explode. The wedding is September 10. Are there some pictures of work you've done that I can see?" I asked.
Looking annoyed and moving papers on his table, he hollered "Hey, Jim, where's that photo album with the bouquets in it? It's around here somewhere."
Jim said "Maybe it's in the cabinet. I haven't seen it in ages. I have to finish putting these ornaments away now."
"I don't have time to look for it now. Honey, your wedding is so far away. Come back in April or May to talk about this." the man said, his voice dripping with annoyance, his look saying "I am so done with you."
"My calendar's in the car. I'll go get it and we can set an appointment. I'm travelling a lot and want to be sure we talk." I replied.
"Oh, honey, call in May to set it up." he said emphatically. Irritation oozed from his voice and face.
"That's how you do business?" I asked.
"Honey, call back in May." he said as he returned to his cluttered table.
I left the disheveled and dirty store thinking "Now that's customer service. That's a phone call I won't make. "
A week later, I went to florist #2 on my list. The shop was spacious, orderly and oddly quiet. "Hello. Anyone home?" I hollered, admiring the delightful arrangements.
From the back a voice said "I'm coming. I'm putting the last flower in this vase." An attractive man appeared. "Hi there. Thanks for waiting. How can I help you?"he said.
"I have a 1 o'clock appointment with Randy to talk about wedding flowers." I answered.
"Randy isn't here. He's making deliveries and can't be reached." he said.
Surprised I said "I talked to him weeks ago and he set this time and he's not here?!" I thought "It's been a long time since I was stood up. Everyone has cell phones and he's not reachable. That's one heck of a delivery he's on!"
The phone rang a week later. The man said "Hi. It's Randy. I called to reschedule our appointment to talk about your flowers. "
"Randy, honestly I was really surprised you weren't there. We'd set the appointment at your convenience! It's taken seven days to call me" I said.
"I can explain." he said, sharing details causing his absence.
I replied "I don't trust you to handle my wedding flowers. I don't know they'd get to the church on time. No one called to cancel the date. You've shone me your customer service and it's not for me. Thank you for your call today."
I wondered "If top two florists do business like this, what's the third one like?"
Is timing really everything?
"Class, we're ending at 4 promptly today so if you want to ask questions, ask before 4. The airline made an agreement with me that the plane would leave, whether I was there or not. Perhaps you've had the same arrangement?" I told my students. I was headed to Florida, the first trip there with Admiral.
Plans had been made since Christmas for this January trip. "People today live and travel together all the time. We're engaged and don't know if we can live together. Let's go to Florida and practice living together." Admiral had said one cold December night. "Look at your calendar and see when you can get away. Arrange it anyway you can. Don't worry about the logistics. My team will get you to and from the airport whenever you need. Pack your suitcase and I'll take it with me when I drive down in January." he continued.
Not one to turn down a trip, I found several two week increments for winter play in Florida. That meant work focused and hard for two weeks at home to have play time. "Let's call it honeymooning. We're practicing this honeymoon stuff til we get it right. At our age it may take a long time since it's hard to teach old dogs new tricks." Admiral said, his eyes twinkling.
When the plane touched down in Ft. Lauderdale, my heart raced. In a few minutes I'd be with my guy, ending a week apart. I hoped I had the right clothes. We had talked frequently, he filling me in on what he was doing in his FL house to get it ready for me. Cleaning was the major project as the house had been closed up since April. While he talked about all the cleaning he was doing, I was recalling cleaning my granny's summer cottage on the rivah bank from the winter's closing. There were snake skins on the mantle, mouse nests in drawers and cabinets and more woodland critters' abandoned homes decorating the loosely secured cottage.
Knowing he is fastidious about his toys' cleanliness, I wasn't surprised about his activities. Thankfully he found time to get the 'little boat' in the water.
The ride from Ft. Lauderdale to Naples was long under the clear starry sky. Because it was midnight it seemed endless. And I was exhausted from a full work day and long travel. The adrenalin had run out. What a way to start a honeymoon.
At last he parked in the drive way, a cozy area surrounded by tall building, lush greenery, palm trees and orange, red and hot pink flowers blooming in the warm night air. A shell wreath welcomed me at the door.
"Welcome to our home and playground." Admiral said as we stood in the light airy foyer. "Let the honeymoon continue."
"And here's the dining room." he said, pointing to a table at one end of a large room, piled high with all things put away in cabinets for years. My heart sank. "I told you I'd been cleaning out. I didn't know all this stuff was packed away. I've pulled everything out of everywhere. You go through it and keep what you want and think you can use. The rest of it we'll get rid of." he stated matter of factly. Now I was overwhelmed. I'd never seen such a pile of stuff, not one bit different from what was stashed around my house.
Fatigue took over. The tour ended when I said "I'm worn out. I can't go another minute."
The next day that mountain was still there. I had no clue what to do. I thought I was here to play and this was not my idea of play. I went through every closet, cabinet and drawer to see what was left and useful. More things I added to the pile, praying the table wouldn't collapse.
"Admiral, come here. I'm not believing this." I hollered from the kitchen, looking at a complete set of Wedgewood Potpourri china. "These dishes were my wedding china! I didn't like them when I picked them out and I still don't like 'em."
"I don't like them either. Get rid of them." he said to my delight.
Boat rides, outings and get-away trips to Walmart were escapes from the daunting pile, whose disappearance had become my responsibility. "Let's get boxes at the grocery, fill them up and give it to Goodwill." I said.
Admiral agreed, 'Yea, this stuff needs to get outta here."
"It'll take us 5 trips to take this stuff away so get ready. We can do it in a morning." I said as cheerfully as I could.
"Hey, lots of this stuff belonged to my late wife and her brother lives 5 minutes away. Maybe he'll want it and see that her brothers and sisters get it." he said.
Several days later, Brother came, delighted to get so many of his late sister's belongings. After a grand visit with the delightful man, the table was clear when he left. I know I heard it breathe a sigh of relief with Admiral and me.
At last it was playtime. While walking on a white, sandy beach Admiral said "I've ordered your engagement ring. I designed it myself. I told you I'd do something different from the little ring you're wearing." Knowing how this engineer over-engineers things, my imagination went wild. "I hope there's some sparkle in it." I thought.
"If you don't like it, it can be changed." he continued. "Whew, thank heavens for that." I thought again.
Finally we were around long enough for a neighbor to visit. Curious about all the activity in the usually quiet house, Hawkeye was all eyes and comments in the short tour to see what had changed in the house. As we chatted in the kitchen, she asked how we met, how family was taking it, what plans there were for his Florida house. Eventually we learned more about each others' work and delight in free time to winter in such a lovely place. She asked, "If you've been single for 19 years, why are you marrying Admiral now?"
" Because he's the right man and I'm crazy about him." I answered emphatically. Admiral appeared around the corner and joined us, ending Hawkeye's inquisition.
After she left, I told Admiral about her relentless questions, especially asking why I accepted his proposal.
He replied " Oh, she was a best girlfriend to my late wife."
Plans had been made since Christmas for this January trip. "People today live and travel together all the time. We're engaged and don't know if we can live together. Let's go to Florida and practice living together." Admiral had said one cold December night. "Look at your calendar and see when you can get away. Arrange it anyway you can. Don't worry about the logistics. My team will get you to and from the airport whenever you need. Pack your suitcase and I'll take it with me when I drive down in January." he continued.
Not one to turn down a trip, I found several two week increments for winter play in Florida. That meant work focused and hard for two weeks at home to have play time. "Let's call it honeymooning. We're practicing this honeymoon stuff til we get it right. At our age it may take a long time since it's hard to teach old dogs new tricks." Admiral said, his eyes twinkling.
When the plane touched down in Ft. Lauderdale, my heart raced. In a few minutes I'd be with my guy, ending a week apart. I hoped I had the right clothes. We had talked frequently, he filling me in on what he was doing in his FL house to get it ready for me. Cleaning was the major project as the house had been closed up since April. While he talked about all the cleaning he was doing, I was recalling cleaning my granny's summer cottage on the rivah bank from the winter's closing. There were snake skins on the mantle, mouse nests in drawers and cabinets and more woodland critters' abandoned homes decorating the loosely secured cottage.
Knowing he is fastidious about his toys' cleanliness, I wasn't surprised about his activities. Thankfully he found time to get the 'little boat' in the water.
The ride from Ft. Lauderdale to Naples was long under the clear starry sky. Because it was midnight it seemed endless. And I was exhausted from a full work day and long travel. The adrenalin had run out. What a way to start a honeymoon.
At last he parked in the drive way, a cozy area surrounded by tall building, lush greenery, palm trees and orange, red and hot pink flowers blooming in the warm night air. A shell wreath welcomed me at the door.
"Welcome to our home and playground." Admiral said as we stood in the light airy foyer. "Let the honeymoon continue."
"And here's the dining room." he said, pointing to a table at one end of a large room, piled high with all things put away in cabinets for years. My heart sank. "I told you I'd been cleaning out. I didn't know all this stuff was packed away. I've pulled everything out of everywhere. You go through it and keep what you want and think you can use. The rest of it we'll get rid of." he stated matter of factly. Now I was overwhelmed. I'd never seen such a pile of stuff, not one bit different from what was stashed around my house.
Fatigue took over. The tour ended when I said "I'm worn out. I can't go another minute."
The next day that mountain was still there. I had no clue what to do. I thought I was here to play and this was not my idea of play. I went through every closet, cabinet and drawer to see what was left and useful. More things I added to the pile, praying the table wouldn't collapse.
"Admiral, come here. I'm not believing this." I hollered from the kitchen, looking at a complete set of Wedgewood Potpourri china. "These dishes were my wedding china! I didn't like them when I picked them out and I still don't like 'em."
"I don't like them either. Get rid of them." he said to my delight.
Boat rides, outings and get-away trips to Walmart were escapes from the daunting pile, whose disappearance had become my responsibility. "Let's get boxes at the grocery, fill them up and give it to Goodwill." I said.
Admiral agreed, 'Yea, this stuff needs to get outta here."
"It'll take us 5 trips to take this stuff away so get ready. We can do it in a morning." I said as cheerfully as I could.
"Hey, lots of this stuff belonged to my late wife and her brother lives 5 minutes away. Maybe he'll want it and see that her brothers and sisters get it." he said.
Several days later, Brother came, delighted to get so many of his late sister's belongings. After a grand visit with the delightful man, the table was clear when he left. I know I heard it breathe a sigh of relief with Admiral and me.
At last it was playtime. While walking on a white, sandy beach Admiral said "I've ordered your engagement ring. I designed it myself. I told you I'd do something different from the little ring you're wearing." Knowing how this engineer over-engineers things, my imagination went wild. "I hope there's some sparkle in it." I thought.
"If you don't like it, it can be changed." he continued. "Whew, thank heavens for that." I thought again.
Finally we were around long enough for a neighbor to visit. Curious about all the activity in the usually quiet house, Hawkeye was all eyes and comments in the short tour to see what had changed in the house. As we chatted in the kitchen, she asked how we met, how family was taking it, what plans there were for his Florida house. Eventually we learned more about each others' work and delight in free time to winter in such a lovely place. She asked, "If you've been single for 19 years, why are you marrying Admiral now?"
" Because he's the right man and I'm crazy about him." I answered emphatically. Admiral appeared around the corner and joined us, ending Hawkeye's inquisition.
After she left, I told Admiral about her relentless questions, especially asking why I accepted his proposal.
He replied " Oh, she was a best girlfriend to my late wife."
How do you move an airplane?
The table was ready. Getting put out was the cat’s reward for shamelessly chowing down at the shrimp bowl. Admiral was glowing as friends arrived to celebrate his birthday.
“Hey, what’re you doing in town now, man? Usually you’re outta here when snow’s on the ground.” “Did you lose your mind when you met Smokie and forget that it’s cold here?” “I’m glad to meet this gal you’ve mentioned. I was wondering about her.” were some friend’s comments. They know how Admiral hates cold to the point the first snow flake sends him packing to warmer climates.
As we partied, Admiral announced “Guys, I need your help in the garage. I built this trailer to haul my airplane to the warehouse for the winter. Give me a hand to get the scrap wood on top of it.” Guys and wives piled into the garage, wowed by its order, cleanliness and bright blue sparkly floor.
“Hey, man! What’s with this glitzy garage?” “You’ve got a show place here.” “I don’t think Smokie’s going to allow you to spill oil on the floor and rebuild motors in here.” Admiral’s long time friends exclaimed. Setting their refreshments down, they lifted, heaved and hefted the wooden mess onto the trailer.
“Thanks, guys, for your help. Get another drink and eat some more. “ Admiral said as he admired the order returned to the garage, his most sacred territory.
“OK. Let’s gather around.” Admiral told guests later. “I want you to meet Smokie. She knows most of you and will soon know the rest of you. I’m delighted to say we’re getting married. No date yet. You’ll be the first to know after we do. “ He continued “ You’re wondering why I’m here in this dreadful cold snow. I’ve been getting treatments everyday and I couldn’t go anywhere til they’re over. I’m happy to say the last one is tomorrow. I’m not sure the machine is turned on as I’ve had no adverse effects. There is much to celebrate for all of us because we can stand up, drive, and think we’re in our right minds.” Agreeing, everyone cheered heartily, raising a toast to health and happiness.
A few days later as Admiral collected things for warm sunshine in Florida, we discussed a wedding date. “It takes time to plan a wedding, no matter the size. So let’s set the date and get the church and reception place booked. Then I know what we have to do and when.” I suggested.
“Good idea. Time can get away from us. Summer’s too bloody hot and we want to cruise up to Nantucket on the boat. Then it’s fall and I don’t want anyone on the road on Labor Day weekend.” he said.
As I got the calendar with our travel dates on it, I asked “What’s your favorite month?” “September.” he replied.
Looking at the calendar I exclaimed “ Gee, September's busy. Look at this! There are 2 weeks here in September open, beginning the weekend after Labor Day. What do you think?” I asked.
Surprised he said “Let me see that calendar.” Looking at it he grinned and said “Hey, 9-10-11 it is! Who’d’ve thought! That’s easy to remember.”
The church and reception were booked for September 10. Now there was serious planning to do.
I was clueless about today’s wedding customs. What better way to get the skinny on what to do and how and know questions to ask the experts.
So several days later we were at the Wedding Expo, a showcase of vendors that had even a slight hint of wedding in their services. Name tags labeled us Bride and Groom. Looking more like grandparents, we wandered the aisles with other Brides, Grooms and friends who didn’t look old enough to be driving. Attire ran the gamut: jeans, professional dress, and over the top tattoos displayed from too revealing clothing.
The music blared current love songs. “I can’t stand talking over loud music. You think some background music might be here?” Admiral asked.
Admiral was a trooper. He experienced a Freeze Frame booth for the first time, totally curious about how it all worked. While I talked to vendors, he stood, looking shell-shocked at the pregnant brides followed by pimply faced boys.
One event planner drew us in with casual conversation. “I see you’re the Bride and Groom. How nice. Have you set your date?” she solicited, her expression saying ‘Are you real?’
Admiral answered proudly “Oh, yes. Nine ten eleven.”
She continued “That’s very soon. “
Admiral quipped “At our age we can’t tarry. We’ve set the church and reception, too.”
“And where are they?” she asked, ready to close the deal.
“We’re getting married at St. James’s Episcopal Church followed by the reception at the Country Club of Virginia.” he stated.
She replied “Well, aren’t you the King and Queen!”
“Hey, what’re you doing in town now, man? Usually you’re outta here when snow’s on the ground.” “Did you lose your mind when you met Smokie and forget that it’s cold here?” “I’m glad to meet this gal you’ve mentioned. I was wondering about her.” were some friend’s comments. They know how Admiral hates cold to the point the first snow flake sends him packing to warmer climates.
As we partied, Admiral announced “Guys, I need your help in the garage. I built this trailer to haul my airplane to the warehouse for the winter. Give me a hand to get the scrap wood on top of it.” Guys and wives piled into the garage, wowed by its order, cleanliness and bright blue sparkly floor.
“Hey, man! What’s with this glitzy garage?” “You’ve got a show place here.” “I don’t think Smokie’s going to allow you to spill oil on the floor and rebuild motors in here.” Admiral’s long time friends exclaimed. Setting their refreshments down, they lifted, heaved and hefted the wooden mess onto the trailer.
“Thanks, guys, for your help. Get another drink and eat some more. “ Admiral said as he admired the order returned to the garage, his most sacred territory.
“OK. Let’s gather around.” Admiral told guests later. “I want you to meet Smokie. She knows most of you and will soon know the rest of you. I’m delighted to say we’re getting married. No date yet. You’ll be the first to know after we do. “ He continued “ You’re wondering why I’m here in this dreadful cold snow. I’ve been getting treatments everyday and I couldn’t go anywhere til they’re over. I’m happy to say the last one is tomorrow. I’m not sure the machine is turned on as I’ve had no adverse effects. There is much to celebrate for all of us because we can stand up, drive, and think we’re in our right minds.” Agreeing, everyone cheered heartily, raising a toast to health and happiness.
A few days later as Admiral collected things for warm sunshine in Florida, we discussed a wedding date. “It takes time to plan a wedding, no matter the size. So let’s set the date and get the church and reception place booked. Then I know what we have to do and when.” I suggested.
“Good idea. Time can get away from us. Summer’s too bloody hot and we want to cruise up to Nantucket on the boat. Then it’s fall and I don’t want anyone on the road on Labor Day weekend.” he said.
As I got the calendar with our travel dates on it, I asked “What’s your favorite month?” “September.” he replied.
Looking at the calendar I exclaimed “ Gee, September's busy. Look at this! There are 2 weeks here in September open, beginning the weekend after Labor Day. What do you think?” I asked.
Surprised he said “Let me see that calendar.” Looking at it he grinned and said “Hey, 9-10-11 it is! Who’d’ve thought! That’s easy to remember.”
The church and reception were booked for September 10. Now there was serious planning to do.
I was clueless about today’s wedding customs. What better way to get the skinny on what to do and how and know questions to ask the experts.
So several days later we were at the Wedding Expo, a showcase of vendors that had even a slight hint of wedding in their services. Name tags labeled us Bride and Groom. Looking more like grandparents, we wandered the aisles with other Brides, Grooms and friends who didn’t look old enough to be driving. Attire ran the gamut: jeans, professional dress, and over the top tattoos displayed from too revealing clothing.
The music blared current love songs. “I can’t stand talking over loud music. You think some background music might be here?” Admiral asked.
Admiral was a trooper. He experienced a Freeze Frame booth for the first time, totally curious about how it all worked. While I talked to vendors, he stood, looking shell-shocked at the pregnant brides followed by pimply faced boys.
One event planner drew us in with casual conversation. “I see you’re the Bride and Groom. How nice. Have you set your date?” she solicited, her expression saying ‘Are you real?’
Admiral answered proudly “Oh, yes. Nine ten eleven.”
She continued “That’s very soon. “
Admiral quipped “At our age we can’t tarry. We’ve set the church and reception, too.”
“And where are they?” she asked, ready to close the deal.
“We’re getting married at St. James’s Episcopal Church followed by the reception at the Country Club of Virginia.” he stated.
She replied “Well, aren’t you the King and Queen!”
What happened to all the snacks?
The church goers greeted us warmly after we heard why Santa do what Santa do. “Y’all come back’” each said, moving on as their curiosity was satisfied.
The Porters, who befriended Admiral during his college days, were there and very welcoming since their last visit years ago. As we followed them up the long winding drive to their home, Admiral said "It's the same house I remembered 50 years ago." Tales of family, friends, funerals and weddings filled the air. Fortunately the chatter was louder than my tummy, roaring to say “feed me.”
Mid afternoon, following the Porters, we took off for lunch about 30 miles down the road in the next town. I did say we were at 40 and plum, didn't I? That's for 40 miles out and plum in the sticks. Enroute Admiral and I searched the car for snacks, only to recall we polished them off yesterday.
Our eyes danced at the all-you-can-eat buffet. Extreme will power and a rational head prevailed to select bits of yummy faves, totally satisfying any hunger pangs that may think about stirring.
All I can say about the drive back to RVA was it was long. "Where did all the traffic come from? Why do they clog up the road I'm on?" I wondered while Admiral napped as I drove.
Christmas plans came, went and made for a fun, very social holiday. At parties we met each other's friends. Admiral was amazed I knew some of his friends. Did he know I went out with one of them? He wondered whom I didn’t know.
There is no place better to end a year or begin a new one than the Hope & Glory Inn in Irvington. The handsomely designed cottages, clever gardens (even in the bleak winter) and delightful lobby with fascinating guests provided stimulating conversations, connecting with ole acquaintances. We had such fun that time slipped away, making us very late meeting wonderful friends for dinner and ringing in the new year.
All too soon the clock struck midnight. Welcome 2011. What would it be like?
The Porters, who befriended Admiral during his college days, were there and very welcoming since their last visit years ago. As we followed them up the long winding drive to their home, Admiral said "It's the same house I remembered 50 years ago." Tales of family, friends, funerals and weddings filled the air. Fortunately the chatter was louder than my tummy, roaring to say “feed me.”
Mid afternoon, following the Porters, we took off for lunch about 30 miles down the road in the next town. I did say we were at 40 and plum, didn't I? That's for 40 miles out and plum in the sticks. Enroute Admiral and I searched the car for snacks, only to recall we polished them off yesterday.
Our eyes danced at the all-you-can-eat buffet. Extreme will power and a rational head prevailed to select bits of yummy faves, totally satisfying any hunger pangs that may think about stirring.
All I can say about the drive back to RVA was it was long. "Where did all the traffic come from? Why do they clog up the road I'm on?" I wondered while Admiral napped as I drove.
Christmas plans came, went and made for a fun, very social holiday. At parties we met each other's friends. Admiral was amazed I knew some of his friends. Did he know I went out with one of them? He wondered whom I didn’t know.
There is no place better to end a year or begin a new one than the Hope & Glory Inn in Irvington. The handsomely designed cottages, clever gardens (even in the bleak winter) and delightful lobby with fascinating guests provided stimulating conversations, connecting with ole acquaintances. We had such fun that time slipped away, making us very late meeting wonderful friends for dinner and ringing in the new year.
All too soon the clock struck midnight. Welcome 2011. What would it be like?
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