When are you dazzled by BSOs?

      "You're the first to see it. Admiral just gave it to me."  I glowed to my daughter during her birthday dinner.   "It's a friendship ring."  The BSO (bright shiny object) sparkled in the light.    
      Girlfriends are the best for sharing yummy exciting things, relishing them over again as you tell each detail of events.  Three weeks earlier I called Artsy. When she answered the phone, I blurted “Admiral just asked me to marry him and I said YES!  Can you believe it?”
     “Were you surprised?” she asked.  It’s been 7 weeks and I’m surprised at me!  When he asked me, I   said ‘I’ll think about it.’  then 5 minutes later I said yes.  This wasn’t part of my plan as you well know. So it looks like I’ll get a new plan.” I said. 
      “I couldn’t wait.” Admiral said excitedly.  “I had to give you this.” He handed me an oval highly polished brass box I’d seen at his home. “Oh, geez.  What is this.  Can I fake being excited about this box?” I thought. 
       In it was a present, wrapped by Admiral himself. The layers of paper and scotch tape gave way from the little square box, revealing the most beautiful ring. It was gold with a sparkly sapphire surrounded by tiny diamonds.  It took my breath away.
      “I wanted to give you something special.  Let’s call it a friendship ring for now.  I’ll get you something better later.” Admiral said.  
     “You know, we’re celebrating my daughter’s birthday tonight.  It’ll be a double celebration and she’ll be the first to know about the ring.” I said, surprised and loving the bright shiny object on my hand.    

How many things go in a ring box?

      Artsy and I began a Smart Woman's tradition with the Urbanna Oyster Festival.  We invite friends to go with us   This year our guys are our invited guests to share the fun.  Thousands flock to this waterfront town for two days to devour the featured bi-valve, making good parking impossible.  Hearing us whine about parking being less than easy, Admiral, with a quick phone call, arranged prime parking for us in town!  Don't you love a man who gets things done!   
       As things usually go with friends in crowds, we got separated from Artsy and her guy because of the big black monster.
      The bus was gigantic and black, like the one Pres. Obama used on his August Midwest tour.    Admiral was beside himself with excitement. 
      “What’s so exciting about a bus? It is chilly and I’m ready to get out of the cold for a while.” I thought as I agreed to touring this black monster.   Admiral was quick to point out the differences between the one he owned and this one since this one was glitzy and filled with lights, chrome and mirrors. And that was the inside.
      Warmed again and still full of oysters, we walked to the car in the primo place, looking for Artsy and her guy with each step.  Of course, in my effort to travel light, I’d left my cell phone in the car.   When we got to the car, we found a note from Artsy.  “Come on in the restaurant around the corner and get warm with us.”   That’s a smart woman!
      The drive home was warm and very short as we recalled the best oysters (fritters from the Lions Club, she crab soup from the Methodist church), the people we saw and vows to save the date for 2011.
      Over casual suppers and outings in boats, planes and old cars, Admiral and I got to know each other better. Respect deepened as we shared gut and heart wrenching losses of marriages from death for him and divorce for me, dreams gone awry and unplanned successes that took us to mountaintops.  We realized how precious our relationship was.  To be healthy, acutely mentally alert, totally in charge of ourselves, and to have fabulous resources was a miracle at our age.   At times we understood each other better than we understood ourselves.
     Birthday dinner with my RVA daughter was another first for Admiral.  He was finally meeting a child he’d heard much about.   She knew this was special as she’d never had more than a fleeting glimpse of men I dated.  After opening her presents, she handed me one.  “You gave me a birthday present already. What’s this?”  I asked about the ring-box shaped, beautifully wrapped package.
     “Open it and see.” she grinned.  
     “It’s a pacifier.  What’s happening?  What in the world… I get it!  Are you…? “ I asked excitedly.          
     “Yep. Due in late May.  Congratulations, GoGo.  Grandbaby #2 is on the way.” she announced.  “You’re the first to know so keep it quiet ‘til I can tell the rest of the family.”
      Then she said, “Hey, Mom, I haven’t seen you wear a ring for years. It looks like Princess Kate’s engagement ring.  What’s that?”